Trying to Manipulate God
One thing that I have noticed over the last 14 years of ministry and counseling work is that some people will use very rosy and intimate language about their relationship with God. This language sometimes centers on verses and ideas about what God can give to us and his promises. Not all of that is bad. We do need to remember his promises and cling to them. What concerns me is when these verses are mentioned, but the ones that mentions our response to Him, how we are to pick up our cross and follow Him, are neglected.
What this seems to come down to is that some people feel as though they can ask God anything, at any time and He is obligated to give to them. Almost like a divine waiter who comes when the bell is rung or when you clap your hands. It is a roll reversal that is really astonishing in its arrogance. That isn't the way the writers of the Bible saw themselves. You notice when Peter and Paul write of themselves, yes, they call themselves apostles, but also bondservants and slaves. Positionally, they understood who was the servant and who was the authority.
Other people will do something that Elizabeth Kubler-Ross mentioned in her book "On Death and Dying" where she mentions one of the stages of grief as bargaining. In other words, a person gets bad news such as a disease or problem and they begin to bargain with God to remove this problem and they will do certain things. Maybe they promise if God saves their child they will go be a missionary in Africa or give some money to the poor or something like that. Again, it is a form of trying to manipulate God to do something we want.
Some people will do this through legalism. I think the Pharisees in Jesus day were masters at this. But, there are also a lot of modern day Pharisees. I remember a church when I was in West Virginia down the road a few miles. The congregation didn't do what some of the elders wanted. So the elders locked the doors of the church and went home. The church had at least one worship service in the parking lot because they couldn't get into their own building. This small group of people were trying to control what went on in "their" church. Some people take the attitude with God like that. Like look at all the good things I have done. Therefore, I deserve for you to bless me.
It isn't as though God is stingy with what He wants to give us. But, it is a matter of perspective. God may very well give you something that you want. Jesus asks the crowd that is following him one day if a son asks his father for a piece of bread will he give him a snake? The crowd laughs and says "Of course not." It was meant as a ironic joke. Jesus knew the question was extreme. Nobody is going to do that who is sane. And then Jesus says that if you being evil know how to give good gifts, then how much more does your heavenly Father.
I think we have to be careful about acting as though we know better than God about what to give and how. Sometimes people ask for prayers to be answered in certain ways. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with saying to God that this is what I would like to happen. He already knows that anyway, so no point in lying about it. But, I think we must be sincere in our statement that we cover that with by saying "Not my will, but yours be done." Sometimes the truth is that this isn't sincere or true. We don't want anything else but what we asked for and God knows that. So, instead of lying, maybe a good way to end that is, "This is what I want, but help me Lord to be content with whatever it is your will is for me." That sounds much more honest that denying our true feelings.
What this seems to come down to is that some people feel as though they can ask God anything, at any time and He is obligated to give to them. Almost like a divine waiter who comes when the bell is rung or when you clap your hands. It is a roll reversal that is really astonishing in its arrogance. That isn't the way the writers of the Bible saw themselves. You notice when Peter and Paul write of themselves, yes, they call themselves apostles, but also bondservants and slaves. Positionally, they understood who was the servant and who was the authority.
Other people will do something that Elizabeth Kubler-Ross mentioned in her book "On Death and Dying" where she mentions one of the stages of grief as bargaining. In other words, a person gets bad news such as a disease or problem and they begin to bargain with God to remove this problem and they will do certain things. Maybe they promise if God saves their child they will go be a missionary in Africa or give some money to the poor or something like that. Again, it is a form of trying to manipulate God to do something we want.
Some people will do this through legalism. I think the Pharisees in Jesus day were masters at this. But, there are also a lot of modern day Pharisees. I remember a church when I was in West Virginia down the road a few miles. The congregation didn't do what some of the elders wanted. So the elders locked the doors of the church and went home. The church had at least one worship service in the parking lot because they couldn't get into their own building. This small group of people were trying to control what went on in "their" church. Some people take the attitude with God like that. Like look at all the good things I have done. Therefore, I deserve for you to bless me.
It isn't as though God is stingy with what He wants to give us. But, it is a matter of perspective. God may very well give you something that you want. Jesus asks the crowd that is following him one day if a son asks his father for a piece of bread will he give him a snake? The crowd laughs and says "Of course not." It was meant as a ironic joke. Jesus knew the question was extreme. Nobody is going to do that who is sane. And then Jesus says that if you being evil know how to give good gifts, then how much more does your heavenly Father.
I think we have to be careful about acting as though we know better than God about what to give and how. Sometimes people ask for prayers to be answered in certain ways. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with saying to God that this is what I would like to happen. He already knows that anyway, so no point in lying about it. But, I think we must be sincere in our statement that we cover that with by saying "Not my will, but yours be done." Sometimes the truth is that this isn't sincere or true. We don't want anything else but what we asked for and God knows that. So, instead of lying, maybe a good way to end that is, "This is what I want, but help me Lord to be content with whatever it is your will is for me." That sounds much more honest that denying our true feelings.
