Picking a church home

Over the last two years, we have been in North Carolina, I have been looking for a church home. At this same time, I am dealing with a lot of hurt I still feel about the way I feel I was treated at the last church I worked at. I am wondering a lot of things right now, including whether or not to remain Baptist. I have visited a number of churches in the area, but most of them seem dead or in the process of dying. One of the larger churches in the area seem to be very hard to get to know people there. So, it seems I don't know where to go or if I should even be trying to find some place to go.
In thinking about what is important to me. I think being in a church where people are friendly is important. I want for the church I am a part of for people to get along with others. A hint of a problem in the church justs makes me want to run away. But, along with friendliness is also the theology and whether or not the sermons mean something. Most of the sermons I have heard lately are on the intellectual level of a 5 year old. An inch deep and a mile wide. I want more.
Also, the kids program needs to be good. I want to be in a church where my kids don't complain about how boring the teacher is and how they hate going like I use to do.
Some other things I think are important are: good music and good attempt at outreach in the community. Obviously, you can't make anyone come and visit or join your church, but you can reach out as a church. It seems there is so many obvious needs that people have. For a church to close its eyes and just do business as usual seems irresponsible to me. Whether it is a tutoring program or benevolence or missions or feeding the hungry, the church should be rolling up its sleeves and getting involved. We are to be the hands and feet and graciousness that Christ himself demonstrated.

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