What God has said to me recently. . . .
Recently, I wrote about my frustrations at finding a new church home. Right after that post, I started going to a church that meets at my son's school which is about a mile from our home. They also have small groups which is something that I really wanted. While it may not be a perfect fit for us, I think if I wait for a perfect fit this side of heaven I will never find it and church hop till I get to heaven. It makes me think again about what my expectations are for a local church. What do you expect when you go to church?
I think it was the second or third service I attended when Scott, one of the copastors got up to speak and really spoke about some themes that had been going through my mind. At that point, I had not met Scott at all or told him what was on my mind. It came back to the idea that I am longing for God to speak to me clearly. I am looking for a clear word from him.
Well, be careful what you ask for, you might get it. One of the things I heard loud and clear is that there are some things in mind that is keeping me from being all that God wants me to be. That is a hard message to hear, but we need to hear it sometimes. One of the things that came to mind was the issue of forgiveness. I have a memory when it comes to past hurts that is eternal. I tend to hold grudges like it was my favorite toy and your trying to take it from me. I may not be able to remember the three things my wife told me to get by the time I get to the store and have to call seven times, but I know what I was wearing five years ago when I was hurt. I remember what the other person was wearing, what was playing on the radio and what I had for lunch that day. I remember what the weather was like and what I did that morning. If it was up to me I would have it on a billboard for everyone to read about. I have a hard time forgiving, but that is exactly what I need to do. I heard God speak to my heart and say loud and clear "let it go" and I heard myself say, "No, not yet."
Then Scott went on with his two prong assault on my heart. It really isn't Scott's fault. I actually like the guy. But, he doesn't fight fair. I forgot my protest sign that morning, so I sat there waiting for the next part of the message. Then Scott says that the other thing that some of us "that's me" need to let go of is "pride". Ouch. It was like someone took out a flashlight and shined it on my heart and said, "This is why you won't let go of this hurt, your pride." So, I had to come to the realization that this is what is holding me back, as the pastor pointed out, pride often does that even though we refuse to call it that. I had to come to the point where I am willing to say though the other person never acknowledges the hurt they caused, I need to give this to God and let go.
Ephesians 4:31-32 "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."
I think it was the second or third service I attended when Scott, one of the copastors got up to speak and really spoke about some themes that had been going through my mind. At that point, I had not met Scott at all or told him what was on my mind. It came back to the idea that I am longing for God to speak to me clearly. I am looking for a clear word from him.
Well, be careful what you ask for, you might get it. One of the things I heard loud and clear is that there are some things in mind that is keeping me from being all that God wants me to be. That is a hard message to hear, but we need to hear it sometimes. One of the things that came to mind was the issue of forgiveness. I have a memory when it comes to past hurts that is eternal. I tend to hold grudges like it was my favorite toy and your trying to take it from me. I may not be able to remember the three things my wife told me to get by the time I get to the store and have to call seven times, but I know what I was wearing five years ago when I was hurt. I remember what the other person was wearing, what was playing on the radio and what I had for lunch that day. I remember what the weather was like and what I did that morning. If it was up to me I would have it on a billboard for everyone to read about. I have a hard time forgiving, but that is exactly what I need to do. I heard God speak to my heart and say loud and clear "let it go" and I heard myself say, "No, not yet."
Then Scott went on with his two prong assault on my heart. It really isn't Scott's fault. I actually like the guy. But, he doesn't fight fair. I forgot my protest sign that morning, so I sat there waiting for the next part of the message. Then Scott says that the other thing that some of us "that's me" need to let go of is "pride". Ouch. It was like someone took out a flashlight and shined it on my heart and said, "This is why you won't let go of this hurt, your pride." So, I had to come to the realization that this is what is holding me back, as the pastor pointed out, pride often does that even though we refuse to call it that. I had to come to the point where I am willing to say though the other person never acknowledges the hurt they caused, I need to give this to God and let go.
Ephesians 4:31-32 "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."
